THE TRUTH ABOUT LOVE: NEW BOOK QUESTIONS EVERYTHING ABOUT RELATIONSHIPS

In a world saturated with dating apps, romantic checklists and the enduring myth of the soul mate, a new book is asking a quieter but more unsettling question: what if love isn’t something we find at all?

Sydney author Mark Worthington’s latest book, The Truth About Love, explores the idea that many of our struggles in relationships, work and life stem from a fundamental misunderstanding of how love actually works.

Rather than framing love as chance, chemistry or fate, Worthington approaches it as an energetic force that shapes every human experience.

“Love is a frequency, not a noun or a verb,” Worthington says. “The love in each of our hearts vibrates at a frequency that is unique to each of us….we are all like large tuning forks vibrating at our own pitch.”

The book draws on a decade-long personal journey that began after Worthington, despite ticking all the conventional boxes of success, found himself repeatedly asking, “Why me? Why am I being punished by life so harshly and so often?”

That question led him into an exploration of metaphysical ideas around love, awareness and personal responsibility.

One of the book’s central arguments challenges the popular notion of soul mates.

Worthington suggests that the fairy tale model of love has conditioned people to seek external validation rather than to develop self-understanding and resilience.

Instead, he argues that lasting relationships are built through awareness and self-love, rather than fantasy.

“We might struggle to choose love because humanity has learned to put rules around love,” he says.

“We’re all conditioned to want the fairytale, to need a romantic partner who meets the image created by our minds and the minds of the people we seek to impress.”

Throughout the book, Worthington blends spiritual concepts with reflections on modern life, including the impact of technology and social media on connection. He argues that constant distraction limits our capacity for presence, intimacy and genuine emotional awareness.

At the heart of the book is the idea that love cannot be outsourced or sourced solely from another person.

“There is another truth at play here,” he says. “The reality is that no other person can ever love you more than you can love yourself. Why? Because you can only ever feel your own love in a loving relationship. You can’t own the feelings of another person. What you can feel is only your feelings.”

Worthington also addresses pain and heartbreak, suggesting they are not random or cruel interruptions to life, but necessary lessons.

“One of the quirks of love is that, if you do not learn its lessons effectively enough, it will bring you the same lessons that you failed to learn from, faster and harder each time,” he says.

Beyond relationships, The Truth About Love touches on broader social issues, including masculinity and emotional awareness.

Worthington argues that empowering men to understand and process their emotions is essential, particularly in addressing domestic violence.

“Prevention of domestic violence must start in the world of education, not legislation,” he says.

The Truth About Love is available wherever books are sold.